The Big Scene at Big C

Imagine this scenario: You want to buy a tablecloth. Your shopping experience would probably look something like this. 

First, you walk into Walmart, head in the direction of the home-goods and find the correct aisle by reading the signs above each aisle. Then if you have any problems you might approach a friendly employee and say, 

"Excuse me. Where can I find a tablecloth?" 

"Aisle 8."

"Okay, thanks." 

So you walk to aisle 8, pick out your tablecloth and your on your merry way in a total of about 5 minutes. Easy, right? 

Well, maybe at home. One of the major challenges of living in Thailand is oftentimes extremely simple and easy situations like these are not easy, at all. In fact, they're kind of weird, awkward, and frustrating. When I tried to buy a table cloth, I unintentionally caused an hour long big scene at Big C. Let me explain...

Big C in Thailand is the equivalent of Walmart or Target in the US. It's a giant store filled with everything you might possibly need: clothes, electronics, home-goods, kitchenware, bedding, beauty products, food, and everything in between. After moving into my new apartment, I took a trip to Big C to pick up some things to get started. I was able to find almost everything on my own just by wandering around the store for about an hour. However, there was one thing left on my list: a table cloth.

Since I had no idea what the word for tablecloth was (first mistake), instead I approached an employee and asked in Thai, "Kor tod ka. Khun pood pa sang ang grid dai mai ka?" or "Excuse me, can you speak English?" They smiled, and responded "Mai dai krap!" which means "I can't!"

I smiled said, "mai pen rai" and began to walk away, trying to figure out my next plan of action. But the employee made a hand motion for me to stop and wait. He called over another employee and asked that employee if he spoke English to which he shook his head and also replied "mai dai krap!"or "I can't! Another employee was called over and asked the same question. This women responded "nid noy" which means "a little." So I asked her, "tablecloth?" Confused face. "Fabric for table?" Confused face.

They motioned me to stay while one employee ran over to another aisle and came back with three more employees from the electronics department. They all started picking things up off the shelves and talking to me in Thai to which I responded, "Chan pood Thai dai nid noy ka" which means "I only speak a little Thai." Yet, despite that statement they kept talking to me in Thai, probably hoping that I would understand something they said. They began picking up random things off the shelf and miming what they were holding, to which I THINK they were indicating that they wanted me to mime what I needed. How on earth do you mime a tablecloth? I tried, but they responded with blank stares.

One employee took my hand and started to walk me somewhere. We ended up in the bedding aisle. One women picked up a comforter/duvet and started to take it out of the bag. I said, "Mai ka, kob khun ka" which means "No thank you." Well, I guess she thought that meant I didn't want THAT specific comforter so she took out another one and started to take it out of the bag. Then all six employees quickly grabbed a piece of the comforter and they're all holding it up for me to see. Oh my gosh, this is not what I want. So I smiled and said "mai ow ka" which means "I don't want." They looked a little disappointed and confused as they folded it back up into the bag. I felt horrible. These poor people are trying so hard to help me. I tried to mime tablecloth again. One women pointed to the sheets. "Mai chai!" or "That's not right!" I quickly said before she even had the chance to take those out of the package. I gave it one last shot to mime tablecloth. Again, blank stares. I felt defeated.

They knew this wasn't working. So what did they do? They told me to stay while they ran and got MORE employees who conveniently also don't speak English. So at this point there are 14, yes, FOURTEEN employees gathered around me and we're playing some weird game of charades. This is out of control. I had no intention of causing a big scene, I just asked a simple question. I wanted to walk away a long time ago; I didn't need the tablecloth that bad. But now I'm thinking, gee, now that I have 14 people helping me I can't just leave without saying something.

I'm frantically trying to figure out how to politely get out of this situation. I actually considered buying the comforter even though I didn't want or need one. Then, a light bulb went off. I have a Thai-English dictionary on my iPhone! I pulled out my phone and typed in the word "tablecloth" and it immediately popped up in Thai script. I showed one employee my phone, he said the word aloud in Thai and the entire group (of 14 employees) unanimously shouted "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

Seriously? Why didn't I think of the iPhone sooner?!?

Then the woman who told me she spoke a little English said to me with a big smile, "No have."

So essentially, it took me one hour to only discover that they don't have tablecloths.

This whole scenario is actually very typical. Thai people have extremely good intentions. They truly want to help you; they will go out of their way to help in anyway they can and they'll do it with a smile. However, I've noticed sometimes people will get involved even when they don't know the answer or really can't help at all. It could be worse. I challenge you to go to Walmart and find 14 employees (at once) who will bend over backwards to help you like these Thai people did for me.

I can't be upset that no one spoke English because I'm living in Thailand and it's my fault that I didn't know the Thai word for tablecloth to begin with. This story is a perfect example of an everyday challenge of living in Thailand that would otherwise be a simple task at home. However, I gladly welcome the challenges that living abroad brings. It sure keeps things interesting.

To this day, I still don't own a tablecloth.